The Spin

TENNIS IS a cruel, cruel game. So, think CBS is happy about its prime-time Dementieva-Kuznetsova extravaganz-va?

WHAT THE FRICK is CBS's U.S. Open highlight show doing having musical guests? It was one thing when Patrick McEnroe wanted to give his wife some air time, but now it's just silly. You have only half an hour, guys -- let's use it for tennis.

MOST RIDICULOUS GRUNT, men's division: Luis Horna of Peru. He doesn't even grunt when he hits the ball, which you'd think would be the whole point of the grunt. He has a pre-hit grunt and a post-hit grunt, the latter being a cheating maneuver that extends into his opponent's stroke.

Uuuuuuuuh, [hit], aaaaeeeeeeh.

Uuuuuuuuh, [hit], aaaaeeeeeeh.

Uuuuuuuuh, [hit], aaaaeeeeeeh.

I can't believe the excitable Spadea hasn't beaten the shit out of him yet, or at least whined about it.